Cheer Up in 60-seconds: Use this…

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Life is full of highs and lows, ups and downs. It’s human nature.   If life was excellent all of the time, we’d appreciate it less. But, that doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t have a quick remedy to cheer ourselves up, right? Well, I’m going to share a method that is at our fingertips all the time and in unlimited supply! Here’s the remedy: the moment you find yourself lingering in negative / unhappy / low energy thoughts… stop what you’re doing for a moment, close your eyes and think of three or four things that you are grateful for in your life. They can be big or little things, tangible or intangible, relationships, friends, opportunities, experiences, health, fitness… anything. There are so many things in life that we can appreciate. We all have a list and it has nothing to do with monetary wealth.Read More »

Finding the Wins amidst the Losses

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In the summer of 2006, at the absolute top of the housing market boom in the SE and literally weeks before one of the biggest housing crashes in history, I purchased my new lakefront house!   The housing market was booming and everyone was making money. Timing was perfect! I figured I’d get a great house, have fun using it and then make a bundle selling it whenever I wanted. Well, things didn’t quite work out the way I wanted. I, like so many, had no idea how wrong I was and how the looming risk was so imminent and so substantial.

As you would expect I grossly overpaid for the house and, today, I’m suffering the consequences as I try to sell it. Twelve-years later and the house is finally under contract to be sold for 30% less than I paid.  Didn’t our parents tell us that real estate is supposed to be a good investment and appreciate ~5% /year?   Well, I guess, like anything, there are good real estate opportunities and bad ones, and so many factors impact the transaction. What makes it worse is that the loss in value of the house is not the only loss. Think of the opportunity cost for the money that has been stuck in a depreciating asset for 12-years. I could invested the money elsewhere where it would have compounded interest for years. Well, enough about the loss.

Interestingly, my misfortune turns out to be a boon for the new buyer who is getting an amazing lake house for tens of thousands less than I paid. One man’s suffering is certainly another man’s fortune. I guess that creates balance in the universe. Furthermore, I’ve learned that I cannot expect to win every time. Other people have to win too!

As I reflect on the lake house transaction further and focus differently, I realize I had substantial intangible gains on the house.   My friends, family and I shared dozens of weekends relaxing, cooking, boating and chatting at the house. It was (and is) a special place that that created indelible memories.   And, if I had not bought the lake house, I would never have met my wife (longer story). Those are some big wins!

When I look back on my life 30-40 years from now, I trust that I will not regret my lake house purchase, despite it being a financial loss. I realize that winning and losing is totally relative. I am grateful for the opportunity to own a lake house and to have shared that with my friends and family. In the scheme of things, I now recognize this as more of a win and great learning experience. Don’t get me wrong… For now, I’m happy to rent a lake house from time to time when the urge arises (and won’t be buying a second home any time soon).

The Smarter Sooner takeaway: be sure to look closely at all of life’s events as there usually are wins (sometimes tucked away) that may just overshadow even the most prickly financial losses. Good luck!

 

 

Hyper Minds

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I never noticed how hyper my mind was until I tried to calm it down a bit. For the longest time, I tolerated my mind’s incessant chatter and activity, assuming it was completely normal. My mind swirled with literally constant activity, whether I was reviewing what just happened, trying to remember to-do lists or contemplating what was soon to happen. Even when there was no reason to be thinking and I thought I was relaxed, I found something to consume me mentally. Does this sound familiar? It only occurred to me recently that the mind, like any tool, should be able to rest. In other words, it does not have to ‘work’ all the time.   And, only when I actively calmed my mind (using some rudimentary meditation techniques), did I realize what a peaceful and energizing experience it was.Read More »

The Zig-Zag Strategy

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When most people ‘Zig’, try to ‘Zag’. That’s the Zig-Zag strategy – short and simple.   The idea is to try and structure your life in manner where you can do MORE of what you want to do (and what makes you happier) instead of what you’re supposed to do. If you’re forced to ZIG (move with the masses) all of the time, you’ll feel refreshed and liberated when you can ZAG (do what you want vs. what you’re conditioned to) from time to time. The key is to get creative / innovative and find these ZAG methods. Obviously, there are times in our lives when we have to do certain things – sticking to strict schedules at work, school, etc. I don’t suggest being irresponsible. But, take a moment to see where there might be opportunities to liberate yourself with some less common, less standard, less conformist methods.Read More »

A Simple Way to Expand Your Mind

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I’ve always felt that I should be reading more books, but somehow, despite the best intentions, find myself with little time to actually crack open a book and focus. I often buy books (physical and kindle books), read sporadically, make very slow progress and become frustrated knowing I’m missing so much richness by not reading more. It nags me.   Does this sounds familiar to you?   15- years ago, this posed a problem, but not any more!. Enter Audio Books and Podcasts, which offer a rich supplement (or complete alternative) to reading – something that I wish I started using sooner. Trust me — once you start accessing the libraries of audio books and podcasts, you’ll be amazed. I was.

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Leverage

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Another important life efficiency concept, distilled by Tony Robbins and others, is Leverage. Leverage is critical because, if used correctly, it frees us to spend more time doing: 1) things that we want to do and, 2) things that are simply a better use of our time. In simplest terms, leverage suggests that we reduce our own personal burdens, workloads and general time commitments by delegating to and utilizing other people and resources in our lives as much as possible. In other words, don’t constantly feel like you have to do everything yourself. Delegate, share, and diffuse the burden. Think how it might feel to reclaim some time back in your life.Read More »

Proximity

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The people we spend time with on a regular basis, or those with whom we are in close ‘proximity’, are ultimately the people that influence us the most. It’s a very simple concept, but one that has substantial repercussions (good and, at times, bad).  Some of the smartest thinkers of our times, including Tony Robbins, emphasizes this concept on a regular basis. Thankfully, we are ultimately in control of with whom we keep company and that gives us power. Think about all the applications of this in your life, and, importantly, your ability to control it. It’s very simple: if you want positive change and inspiration in your life, surround yourself with the people who embody those things (and, simultaneously, distance yourself from people who influence you in a undesirable ways).Read More »

Dinner Out vs. a Gym Membership

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If you’re anything like I was, you’d happily pay $75 for dinner out, but you might hesitate spending that for a month’s gym membership.  You’d also pay $6 for a Beer quite easily, but you’d rarely splurge for a fresh Veggie Juice for the same price?  What about paying $15 for lunch versus a drop-in Yoga class?  Ask yourself these questions and consider the irony.

The fact is that we easily, often and without much thought spend substantially on things like dinners out, beer, wine, cappuccinos and more. Think of how much you spend at Starbucks on a monthly basis. Now, think of how much you spend per month at the bar or at the liquor store?  I personally spent a ton over the years doing these things.  And, if you do the math, the amount is totally disproportionate to the amount we spend on your health, especially given the returns.

A beer, glass of wine or mixed drink at a bar or restaurant is expensive (and unhealthy). But, for some reason, we are conditioned to pay for it without hesitation. The same goes for expensive coffee drinks, dinners out and more. It’s more familiar and seems like a normal expense.

Now, think of spending $100 per month for a gym (yoga, health club, whatever) membership. Oddly, that seems like a hefty bill and that ends up being a major deterrent for better health. While we spend more at just 2 or 3 dinners out, somehow health clubs have to be dirt cheap of we won’t join. And, while we think a health club membership is expensive, we liberally spend $5+ daily at Starbucks ($150 or more a month)!

The irony: Our health is the most important thing that we have and therefore it should be the thing in which we invest the most. Without our health, we cannot enjoy life (including visits to great restaurants). And, if you really analyze it, investing in our health and well-being is not really that expensive. Perhaps it just feels expensive when we look at its cost in isolation. But, when you compare its cost to things that we freely spend money on (dinner, drinks, etc.), it should feel a lot more comfortable.  Be sure to add the tangible and intangible benefits of being healthier to your calculations!

So, next time you’re near a Whole Foods (or similar), pop in and buy a fresh veggie juice. Rejoice since it’s cheaper than a liquor drink, and, importantly, because it will nourish and sooth your body, bring energy and vitality to your life and even combat some of the ill-effects of drinking alcohol or eating rich meals out. And, consider joining your local gym (yoga studio, crossfit, spin, kick boxing, whatever) and think of the cost of doing this as low, compared to many of our other living expenses, while the upside is priceless: better health.

It’s all how we look at expenses and benefits. After many years of living and recognizing the above concept, I gladly invest in all sorts of healthy things in my life because I’m willing to pay for things that create the most value / benefit in my life.  I guess I’m a bit Smarter now than I was 20 years ago!

Try it out and see how you feel.

 

Work More or Retire Early?

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If you were given the option to retire early from your career (and could afford it), would you? This seems like a dumb question as most people would jump at the opportunity to quit work.   But, is retirement really better than a working career? After being away from work for almost 2-years now, I would argue that leaving your working career too early might be a mistake.   Now that I’m a bit Smarter Sooner, I suggest carefully contemplating work vs. retirement because it has a lot of implications, well beyond the most obvious factors: free time and money.  Here is my perspective…Read More »

The Alcohol Trap

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Drinking alcohol can be a trap – something I’ve learned after NOT drinking it for the past 90-days+.

For most of us, beer, wine and/or liquor drinks are a default part of our daily lives. From a relatively young age, we have become conditioned to drink without even thinking about it. Social events, business events, cooking dinner, eating dinner, after dinner, parties, food-pairing, special events, while boating, while watching sports, after exercising, when at the beach, après ski, celebrating, commiserating… these are all prompts and reminders for us to drink. We don’t have to look very hard to find a reason or place to ‘have a drink’.  This is socially accepted and encouraged by the beer, wine and liquor industries whose marketing is very effective. Whether we realize it or not, we are socially and behaviorally conditioned to drink and it is likely an embedded part of our lives.   And, by the way, the liquor business laughs all the way to the bank.Read More »